Inner Peace

I'm sorting and cleaning out what feels like a hundred years worth of family history. There's also "stuff" that was too good to toss, but I didn't know what to do with so it got stuck in a file that outgrew its capacity. I ran across a bit called "Symptoms of Inner Peace" and decided to save it for my next blog. Little did I know how appropriate it would be today. Then again, I'm a believer that there are times things come into our hands when we really need them. Here's the list:

Symptoms of Inner Peace

1. Tendency to act spontaneously rather than from fears based on experiences from the past.
2. The ability to enjoy each moment.
3. Loss of interest in judging self.
4. Loss of interest in judging other people.
5. Loss of interest in conflict.
6. Disinterest in interpreting actions of others.
7. Loss of ability to worry.
8 Frequent episodes of appreciation.
9. Contented feelings of connectedness with others and nature.
10. Frequent attacks of smiling through eyes of heart.
11. Increasing susceptibility to love extended by others as well as the uncontrollable urge to extend it.
12. Increasing tendency to let things happen rather than trying to make them happen.

Note: Persons exhibiting most or all of these symptoms may be in such advanced state of peace as to be untreatable. The verse following may be the reason:

Isaiah26:3-4 "Thou will keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee. Trust ye in the LORD for ever: for in the LORD JEHOVAH is everlasting strength."

This is something I'm definitely working on. Some I've attained; some may take another 20 years, if I've really got that many left. :) Number three was a problem this week. I've been very good to get up at 4:00, do prayers, scripture study, journal, e-mail, then do my Wii Fit for 45 minutes, then start my day. By that time, it's 7:00 and I feel three hours behind on starting on the long list of things to do. I even put all those things on my list so I could check them off (is that called compulsive behavior??) but that didn't help too much with the frustration.

So I just threw it all over yesterday and slept in until 4:30, did my body test so my WiiFit wouldn't scold me for not showing up and skipped the exercise. I'd given blood the day before and she said no exercising for 24 hours. Used that as my excuse. It was actually fun to just not even look at my list and spend the morning cleaning and straightening my office where all my projects always pile up. I did do laundry and things that really had to be done, like writing a note to my sister who doesn't do e-mail.

Before I knew it, my husband was home from golfing and ready for lunch - and I still had a long list of things I needed to do. You know what I did? I tossed the list and spent two hours with Glenn putting a puzzle together because he couldn't work out in the yard. Then felt guilty because I'd played. So number three needs lots of work. (I've just broken every one of the things on Anna's list of how not to write! But I'm not really writing - I'm thinking out loud!)

We should never feel guilty for just enjoying time with our spouse or friends or family. How do we get over being so accomplishment oriented? Mmm. Does that mean number one is also a problem? I'm good in the appreciation department, pretty good in the spontaneous area, okay in judging others and conflict. I did enjoy the moment even if later I felt guilty so does the guilt cancel out the joy? And if I continue to try to grade me, will I disrupt what inner peace I may already have? Too much introspection may not be good for that.

Guess I'd better keep the list handy and work on some of my hang-ups so I can experience Inner Peace more often. Hope I've given you cause for some, instead of disrupting what you may already have had!